5 Mistakes Men Make When Meeting Women Online

So you’re thinking of giving online dating a shot?

Great.

But before you start messaging women on all the popular dating websites/apps, there’s a few things you must know.

First things first, don’t take online dating seriously.

Why?

Because women receive a TON of messages on dating websites.

The more attractive she is, the more messages she gets.

Period.

So, just because a woman doesn’t respond to your message doesn’t mean she rejected you.

Got it?

Good.

There’s a good chance she didn’t even see your message since her inbox is overloaded with messages from other men.

What, you thought you were the only guy trying to meet women online?

Think again, my friend.

Online dating isn’t the same as approaching women in real life.

In real life, you have her FULL attention.

Online, you’re competing with hundreds (possibly thousands) of men.

You’re also competing with all her other distractions like text messages, her favorite TV show, her gym class, and so on.

The moral of the story is not to take it personal if you don’t here back from her.

In fact, you can expect not to hear back from most women you message.

But don’t let that discourage you.

Online dating is a very useful tool for meeting women.

Sure, a lot of them might not respond, but there will always be those that do.

For those women who do respond, below are five things you must avoid doing so you can increase your chances of landing a date with them.

1) Avoid continuous messaging

Don’t start sending her countless messages online.

This is one of the BIGGEST mistakes men make when meeting women online.

Chat for a few and then ask for her number.

Remember that she’s getting a lot of messages from other men.

Your goal is to get her attention away from the dating website/app and have her 100% focused on YOU.

Makes sense?

By messaging her too much online, you risk losing her to some other guy who asks for her number before you do.

Next thing you know, he sets up a date with her, they hit it off, and she’s gone.

My rule of thumb is to chat for about 10 minutes and then say something like “I’m heading to the gym. What’s your number so I can call you on the way?”

Talk to her for on the phone for a few, but end the call quickly.

This brings me to my next point.

2) Don’t wait too long to schedule a date

When I started meeting women online, I’d spend hours talking to them on the phone.

I figured that the more I talked to them on the phone, the more I’d gain their trust and make them feel comfortable enough to meet me”.

It makes logical sense, right?

Well, guess what?

It backfired.

A lot.

Women would continuously cancel or flake on dates.

One day, out of frustration, I stopped spending hours on the phone with women.

“What’s the point?” I asked myself.

Instead of spending hours on the phone, I’d spend about five minutes and would then schedule a date.

Interesting enough, my dating success SKYROCKETED!

Less and less women would cancel or flake on me.

Funny how that is, huh?

And then I had an epiphany…

By spending hours on the phone with women, I was becoming their friend and lowering their attraction for me.

Who would’ve’ known?

I was also doing one very bad thing for attraction: Giving her too much importance

Inside my Dating Mastery book, I go into detail on why it’s EXTREMELY important not to give women too much attention at the beginning.

Doing so forces them to lose attraction for you.

Why?

Because she learns everything about you and has nothing left to look forward to.

Just like she knows everything about her best friend, she knows everything about you.

Are you seeing the correlation?

You go from being the next guy she dates to being her new friend.

Not good.

So how do you avoid this from happening?

Chat for five minutes on the phone and then say “So there’s this coffee shop I really like. Meet me there tomorrow at 7:00 p.m. I’ll text you the address”. (More on this later)

If she agrees to the date, great.

If she doesn’t, say “Nice to meet you. Bye.”

Sounds cruel, right?

Maybe it is.

But answer me this.

What’s the point of investing more time talking to her without knowing if the two of you will ever meet?

…and…

Without knowing if the two of you will hit it off in person?

Think about it.

Look, man, if you want to become her new friend who spends hours on the phone with her, go ahead.

But if you want to date her and keep her attraction level for you HIGH, keep things short and to the point.

This will show her that you value yourself and are not willing to invest time in someone without meeting them first.

Are you following me?

Unlike most men who treat her like a goddess (without barely knowing anything about her) in hopes of getting laid, you’ll come across as different.

You’ll come across as a man with standards who isn’t desperate.

And that, my friend, is exactly what women want. (Whether they’ll admit it or not)

They want a man with standards and self-respect.

A man who only allows a woman to become important to him once he meets her and gets to know her.

Pause for a moment and think about what I’m about to say.

Why would a man invest so much time talking to a woman on the phone who he doesn’t know and hasn’t met yet?

What do you expect women think of men who do this?

Is it that he’s desperate and lonely?

Perhaps he’s has nothing better to do?

Maybe he’s a loser that no other women want?

Do any of the three examples above sound like things women find attractive in men?

Think, my friend.

Think.

3) Don’t ask

It’s very, VERY important that you lead her.

Don’t ask where, when and why to meet you for a date.

TELL HER!

Women are attracted to assertive men.

By asking her, you’re giving her to the power to lead.

She doesn’t want that power, and she’ll resent you for giving it to her.

Trust me.

You basically tell her “I’m letting you take the lead so you can make all the decisions. I’m doing this because I’m not assertive and want to keep you happy so I don’t risk losing you”.

Just like my coffee shop example above, tell her when, where and why.

When: Tomorrow at 7:00 p.m

Where: coffee shop

Why: I love it

Got it?

Good.

You always want to communicate “I’m giving you a chance to meet me for coffee to see if you’re worth getting to know”.

Of course, you’ll never directly say this to women.

Your actions will do all the talking.

Coffee is cheap, low-risk and lets you decide whether or not you want to see her again.

Same goes for her.

If the two of you don’t hit it off, you can both get up and walk away.

No harm, no foul.

4) Don’t text her before your date

After setting up the date, don’t start texting her all day.

Continuous text messaging is another common mistake men make when meeting women online.

She’s not your friend (unless you want her to be), someone you’ve known a while, or someone that’s important to you yet.

There’s no reason to text her all day.

You already set up the date.

Now, wait until then to talk to her again.

Remember, she wants to feel like she has to earn your time and attention.

Since most men are easily won over by women, you’ll stand out from the crowd by being different.

You become a challenge.

Women want and enjoy a challenge.

Give it to them.

Another thing I teach inside my book is how bad predictability is for attraction.

Most men are extremely predictable to women.

Remember that women go on a lot of dates and have seen it all.

Most of time, they know when and what a guy is going to do next.

Many men online will message her all day out of fear of losing her.

Guess what?

By doing so, they’re almost guaranteed to lose her because she knows exactly why they’re behaving this way.

They’re insecure and desperate.

As a result, they don’t come across as a challenge and push women away instead of keeping them attracted.

5) Don’t spend too much time on the first date

This is one of my golden dating secrets.

As soon as I started doing this, I immediately saw how a woman’s attraction for me would GROW!

All I would do is end the date early.

What do most men do on dates with women?

They stick around AS LONG AS POSSIBLE in hopes of getting laid.

Women know and expect this.

However, when you end the date early, you shock her. (In a good way)

Suddenly she’s left wondering “Whoa! This is different.”

She starts thinking things “Did he like me? Will he call me again? Did I do something wrong?”

This results in her thinking about you all day long which automatically increases her attraction for you.

So how do you end a date early?

Do you get up in the middle of drinking coffee and say “I’m out of here honey!”.

Not exactly.

Instead, spend 25-30 minutes talking to her and then end the date.

Most men say something like this at the end of the date “What are you going to do now?”

This immediately tells her that you want to spend more time with her and are asking for confirmation.

Don’t ask anything.

End the date by saying “Let’s get going.”

Then walk with her out the coffee shop and say “Nice meeting you. Bye.” and leave.

This will be very hard for you to do, especially if things go well during the date and you like her a lot.

But it’s necessary.

It will have her thinking about you non-stop.

Even if she didn’t like you much for whatever reason, this simple action on your part will force her to think about you non-stop.

Try it.

Talk soon,

-Alex Writer