How to Create a Habit That Actually Sticks
Let’s be honest here… Change is hard, period.
Learning how to create a habit is simple, but not easy.
When you ask the question ” How to create a habit that actually sticks”, you feel as if you might already know the answer.
None of us want to change.
Wait, maybe we do.
None of us want to be uncomfortable though.
In order to change and create a habit, you must do things that make you uncomfortable.
You must do these things over and over until they are no longer uncomfortable, they begin to feel EASY.
They become a habit.
A habit is a behavior that you repeat over and over until it becomes automatic.
“Motivation is what gets you started, Habit is what keeps you going.” – Jim Ryan
At the beginning you have to force yourself to do the new habit every day, without skipping a day, until it takes over your mind and it just happens automatically.
Here’s the problem, your brain hates change, even if the change is good.
We come pre-wired to remain the same, it’s a survival instinct.
This is what initially makes it hard to create a habit.
Even though when you want to create a habit that can change your life for the better, your brain does not want you to.
Any habit that you have in your life is a result of behavior that you repeated over and over. The type of food you eat, the music you listen to, the type of people you hang out with.
It’s all habit!
When something becomes a habit, it feels comfortable and easy. You like easy and comfortable, don’t you?
“We become what we repeatedly do” – Stephen Covey
How Habits Become Easy
The good news is that you can turn any desired behavior into a habit and it’s actually pretty simple!
But Alex if it’s so easy to create a habit. then why doesn’t everyone do it and change their life?
The answer is Inertia.
“Inertia – a tendency to do nothing or to remain unchanged.”
The force and effort required by you to create a new habit and repeat the new behavior over and over until it becomes automatic (a habit) requires willpower!
Our brain does everything in its power to resist us from changing.
Once a new behavior becomes a habit, we no longer feel resistance to do it. We actually begin to enjoy it!
When you start a new exercise routine, an eating lifestyle, or something as simple as reading 15-20 minutes before bed, your brain begins to say:
“Hey what’s going on here? Why are we doing this? There’s no reason to! Everything is fine and I’m comfortable! Change is stupid! STOP!”
How many people have you seen that sign up for a gym membership in the New Year, go for maybe 1-2 weeks, if that, and then stop?
Why do they stop?
Because they don’t go often enough for it to become a habit! That’s why!
Eventually their brain starts to say:
“Why are you doing this? Do you enjoy being sore and in pain? You’re wasting so much time and gas driving back and forth to the gym? Maybe right now isn’t the best time to start working out!”
Of course, you don’t actually hear these things going on in your mind when you try to create a habit, but believe me when I tell you that your brain is amazing at coming up with excuses on why you should stop something, even when it will change your life for the better.
Now if all these people would just FORCE themselves to go, eventually after about 30 consecutive days, they will actually begin to look forward to going to the gym!
They will develop the gym habit!
That’s the trick to create a habit, that’s all you need to understand. You must force yourself to go until eventually you will WANT to go.
Create a Habit Without Failing
So here’s how to make sure that you do not stop doing a new behavior until you turn it into a habit.
NOTE: You MUST follow exact instructions below in order to develop a habit. If you don’t, you will most likely find an excuse to skip the habit one day.
Find an accountability partner, someone who you can trust but that will also be tough on you!
Go to this person and repeat the following statement:
“For the next 30 days, I am going to do _____________ every single day. Your job is to make sure that I do it. The first day that I don’t do it, you get to keep ___________.”
In the first line, you will write the new behavior that you want to turn into a habit.
So, if I want to burn a TON of fat (Click here to see how I did it), I will write it like this:
“For the next 30 days, I am going to do the Demon Diet every single day. Your job is to make sure that I do it. The first day that I don’t do it, you get to keep my $100.”
In the second line you will provide your accountability partner with something that they get to keep if the first day that you decide to skip the new behavior.
Money is usually a good choice, and make sure it’s an amount that you will really regret losing.
The trick is to pick something that you will to give away that will be a lot more painful to lose than it will be to skip the new habit on any given day.
I promise you that if you follow that plan, you will do the behavior every day and it will become a habit after 30 days.
Example: “I don’t feel like going to the gym today, but if I don’t go I’m going to have to pay my friend $500! OK, I guess I’ll go to the gym”.
Do you see how powerful this is?….DO IT!
That’s it my friend!
No need to spend a lot of money on some program or coach who will promise to change your life.
No need to have to sit down and read a whole book on how habits are formed (even though the information is interesting).
Just follow my steps and I guarantee that you will create a habit in any area of your life that you desire.
Imagine if you did this for a year decided to create a habit every month.
That’s 12 new habits in a year!
How different will your life be?
How much happier and productive could you become?
What can you have that you always wanted?
You now know a fail-proof way on how to create a habit that actually sticks, take action!
IMPORTANT: Don’t deviate! Write down what new habit you are going to start today, write down what your punishment will be if you skip it, and begin to change your life.
RIGHT NOW!
-Alexander Writer
James says
Great article, I love your writing style.
Alex says
Thank you James!
Philip Braselmann says
This is pretty strong advice & very strong branding.
For everyone that has nobody that will keep them accountable, just ask your mother!
3 years ago I asked my mother to keep me accountable on quitting to smoke (It also works for establishing the habit NOT TO DO things!)
I asked her to keep the 100€ I gave her should I smoke again, If I manage to quit for a month she would give me the 100€ back.
Needless to say, I got my money back and quit smoking. And the funny thing is that I can smoke a package of cigarettes and quit. I do this for 3 years now and I smoke on parties, or when I am stressed and I can always quit it afterwards because I learned how it works!