If you want me to help you with your specific dating situation, see the end of this article for more details.
So you really like her, huh?
You think about her all the time, love spending time together, and want to take things to the next level.
Right?
But there’s a problem…she wants to be friends and nothing more.
You’re probably asking yourself the three questions below:
- Should I do it?
- Should I be her friend so I don’t risk losing her forever?
- Isn’t it better than nothing?
The answer to these questions is: NO!
Being “just friends” is the WORSE thing you can do and nothing is a million times better.
By “nothing” I mean you never see or talk to her again.
That means no more hanging out, talking on the phone, texting or any social media contact.
When a woman suggests being just friends, the BEST thing you can do is cut all contact with her.
As soon as you hear the word “friends” come out of her mouth, run away fast as if she were trying to kill you.
In essence, she is trying to kill you (emotionally), and she’s going do it painfully and slowly.
Obviously, don’t literally start running, that’s going to make you look like a maniac.
Instead, tell her the magic words I’ll share with you at the end of this article.
Next, if you’re talking to her on the phone or texting, stop it.
If you’re hanging out with her, tell her you have to be somewhere and leave.
All of this will make sense by the end of this article, so get comfortable, eliminate all distractions and focus.
You’re about to learn 10 reasons why being friends with a woman you want, slowly kills your chances of ever being with her.
1) It’s not what you really want
Why are you even considering being her friend?
…It’s not what you really want!
You know it and she knows it, so why are you doing it?
Guess what?
Women don’t find it attractive when men settle for less than they want and deserve.
By accepting her offer to being just friends, you’re making a HUGE mistake that KILLS any chances of her changing her mind later.
You’re communicating weakness, insecurity, and lack of self-respect.
Do those sound like qualities women want in men?
Listen to me…
A real man, the kind of man she really wants and desires, either gets what he wants, or walks away.
Period.
Settle for being just friends?
Come on, man, you and I know both know you’re better and smarter than that.
2) She’ll lose respect and attraction for you
The moment you accept being friends is the same moment she loses any respect and attraction she had for you.
Sure, she might hang out with you, but don’t let it confuse you.
She’s not hanging out with you because she’s slowly falling for you.
No, my friend, she’s hanging out with you until some guy, who she’s attracted to, comes along and takes her from you.
And guess what?
You’ll feel terrible and realize that it’s all your fault for allowing her to make you her friend.
This brings me to my next point…
3) You’ll suffer
I’ve been where you are so I know what you’re thinking:
“Being friends with her will allow us to spend time together and possibly lead to something physical?”
Wrong.
Nothing physical is ever going to happen because she sees you as a FRIEND!
That means no kissing, and definitely no sex.
Here’s what will happen…
The moment she meets a guy she really likes, she’ll tell you about it.
Why wouldn’t she…you are her friend, right?
Let me ask you a question…
How do you think it’s going to feel when she tells you that she met someone?
Imagine the following…
There you are thinking that she might change her mind and decide to be more than friends, when all of a sudden she says: “I met this great guy I really like”.
Next, she’ll begin going on dates with him and share details with you.
You’ll go from possibly dating her, to becoming her friend, to…
4) You’ll become her girlfriend
Since you’re her friend, she’ll treat you the same way she treats her lady friends.
She’ll tell you how much she likes the guy she’s dating, how much fun they have, and how she constantly thinks about him.
Sure , you’ll still hang out together.
She’ll bring you along shopping so you can help her find something sexy to wear for the guy she’s dating.
Are you beginning to see why it’s such a bad idea to accept being her friend?
Is that what you want?
Look, unless you want to be treated like a lady friend, don’t ever, ever, EVER agree to being friends!
Got it?
5) She will never magically begin feeling attraction for you
A woman doesn’t choose whether or not to feel attraction for a man.
She either feels it or she doesn’t.
This is incredibly hard for many men to understand, but the reality is that women can’t help who they do and don’t feel attraction for.
The only person who gets to decide whether she feels attraction for you or not is YOU!
No amount of buying her gifts, taking her to expensive restaurants, texting and calling her all the time will change her mind.
She’s either attracted to you or she’s not.
Inside my book, I explain what it really takes to make a woman feel attraction for you.
You don’t have to read my book right now, but when you do, you’ll quickly realize why you’ve lost women in the past.
6) You’ll waste time and opportunities
By spending time with your “friend”, you’re wasting time and missing opportunities to meet women who will actually give you what you want.
Instead of waiting around until your new friend finds a man to replace you with, maintain your self-respect, move on and focus on meeting other women.
If there’s even the slightest chance that she’ll come back and decide to date you instead of being friends, it will be because you maintained your place as a man and she couldn’t help but feel attracted to you for doing so.
Read that sentence again.
But, if you settle for being just friends…you’re DONE!
7) There’s 3 BILLION women in the world
Do you have any idea how many women are waiting for you to approach them?
You don’t seriously think this women is your ONLY option, do you?
Don’t make me laugh.
You have many, many, MANY options.
Yes, I know you like this one a lot, I get it.
But think of it this way…
What if you like the next woman you meet more than you like this one?
Would this girl even matter then?
Would your ex-girlfriend matter (if she still does) if you started dating the current woman you like who’s asking you to be friends?
Of course not.
It’s all in your mind, my friend.
Think about it…
How to respond to “Let’s be friends”
Do you just say no and walk away?
Well, yes, but you’re going to say something first.
Here it is: “You and I would never be friends, it’s impossible.”
When you respond this way, you’ll immediately notice a confused look on her face.
There’s a 99.9% chance that she’ll respond: “Why not?”
And that’s when you’ll say: “Because it’s not what I want so it will never happen”.
Since 97% of men act like insecure and needy wussies when women suggest being friends, you’ll immediately stand out.
Sure, she might not change her mind about you immediately, but at least you’ll gain her respect.
It’s impossible for a woman to feel attracted to a man whom she doesn’t respect.
As soon as you end the interaction, don’t contact her.
Instead, wait until she contacts you, and trust me that she will.
Your response and actions will make it impossible for her to forget you.
It might take a few days, weeks, or months, but trust me that you will hear from her again.
When she contacts you, act indifferent about how things ended and invite her to hang out the following week.
You want to make her wait a little so she doesn’t think that you’ve been waiting by the phone for her to come back.
When the two of you hang out, make sure you go in for the kiss so you can avoid falling back into the friend zone.
Remember, be patient, don’t contact her, and don’t EVER settle for less than you deserve.
I’ll let you take the wheel at this point…make me proud!
Talk soon,
-Alexander Writer
PS – Need personal advice about a woman in your life? This month only, I’m responding to emails from men who get my book Dating Mastery. Once you download the book, skip to pg. 70 to get access to my private email so you can contact me immediately. I’ll show you how to fix your situation with her.
Click here now to learn more about my book
Titus says
Might sound harsh to some but I’d advice to not be “friends” with women at all, whether you wanna f*** em or not, if you don’t then why even bother? I’ve met only 2 women thus far who could hold up deep conversations with me about philosophy and the likes of that and those two were on the spectrum of Autism so it was similar to talking to a man. Anyhow, point is that you run the risk of 1) wasting your time 2) becoming an emotional tampon for them 3) barely get good conversations or help from them. Not to mention the countless videos/statistics to show that men and women can’t be “friends” Kinda got on a rant here but your article sparked these thoughts so thanks for that, enjoyed reading it.
Joey the Hustler says
I know three kinds of men:
1st kind: Friends with girls, occasionally gets laid, gets invited out. Has fun.
2nd kind: Friends with everyone, genuinely cool guy, has lots of female friends, has lots of guy friends, has the ability to make you believe that when you’re talking to him, he actually gives a fuck about everything you’re talking about. He laughs at himself when he acts foolish, swears he can’t fight (except he was dating a german popstar and got his throat slit defending her, long story but you can google it.) and generally gets into ridiculous situations. As a result, women adore him and they want to fuck him all the time.
3rd kind: Guy walks around clueless about women, refuses to be friends with women and treats them like receptacles for his dick. As a result, he has few friends and creeps women out all the time. He occasionally gets a pity fuck from some drunk trashy girl then he treats her like dirt when she didn’t want to fuck him again.
Having female friends gets you more ass than not having female friends. Because when you go out, being around a couple attractive women makes you look more attractive. The rest of the bar doesn’t know the girls are just your friends, they think you’re the man. Plus your cool female friends can talk to the girl you’re interested in for you. Good female friends are like little soldiers that will go out and do things for you.